Union-Bulletin

Some people do what they do for the money.

Some do it for the fame.

But some just do it for the love, like these people.

Gov. Jay Inslee to state Republicans:

I know you’re slow to give your love

To warm me with your bounty

In case you missed it though, I’m gov, cuz

McKenna lost King County.

Teachers union to Democrats:

The corporations want our kids

You must resist their new attack

We hear they’re bringing more “reforms”

In big school buses, painted black.

Legislature to corporations:

Hey Balmer, have you seen this bridge?

We’ll sell it to you for some dough

U of Boeing? Starbucks Ridge?

Who can guess how low we’ll go.

State Supreme Court to Legislature:

It’s not that we don’t love you

It’s just that we are leery

You speak sweet nothings in our ear

But still don’t fund McCleary.

Legislature to state Supreme Court:

We read with care your lengthy note

About the schools we’re proud of

But have you never heard the phrase

That money can’t buy love?

I-502 sponsors to state liquor board:

Roses are red

Lilies are long

You want more taxes?

Please pass the bong.

Seattle Mariners to fans:

Defensively we’re just so-so

Again we’ll struggle for each run

The bullpen? You don’t want to know

But hey, our scoreboard’s No. 1!

Seattle NBA fans to Sacramento:

It saddens us to hear you rant

Our town repeatedly you’ve slurred

We only want what’s rightly ours

And “steal” is such an ugly word.

Senate GOP to Rodney Tom and Tim Sheldon:

We’ll try to count the ways we love

The way you make us feel alive

Without you we’re just twenty-three

But with you we are twenty-five.

Senate Democrats to Tom and Sheldon:

Although we never loved you

We liked you plenty fine

But since you dumped us you’ve become

Our anti-Valentine.

Gov. Inslee to taxpayers:

I know how much you hate the tax

So now that I’m the boss

We’ll fund the schools and add new jobs

With nothing more than secret sauce.

President Obama to House Speaker Boehner:

We’ve had some rough times, that’s for sure

We’ve had some bruising riffs

But think of all the love we’ve shared

Locked arm-in-arm at fiscal cliffs.

House Speaker Boehner to President Obama:

Please don’t think our love is dead

Cuz while you spoke I didn’t rise

It’s politics, I hope you know

At least I didn’t roll my eyes.

Peter Callaghan can be reached at peter.callaghan@thenewstribune.com